I never imagined life would feel this full. My day-to-day schedule is so tightly packed and compressing that bones are turning to oil. If I’m being honest, there are moments when I think it’s too much and I can’t handle it; and if I’m behind dishonest, don’t worry, I’ve got this all under control. Every morning I pick up the balls one by one… exhaustion, dog, work, baby, webcomic, bills, sales, errands, food, hobbies, career path, future. And I juggle.
I can’t possibly catch them all, so I focus on the most fragile and forgive myself for the balls I won’t pick up again until tomorrow.
This site is slowly coming together. Again. I’m cleaning up its old posts and function in general. Plenty of things will never be perfect, not without time or money, and I have to move forward with these imperfections gnawing at me. Not something I’m used to, but something I must accept without time or money. I suppose it’s in my nature to worry that these imperfections define me; maybe that’s why I used to spend so much time obsessively analyzing each and every word. I’m easing to the idea that I don’t need a negative-drive for improvement. Despite how full my life seems, it also contains so much possibility and positivity, and maybe I just have to step aside and let it drive me.
